When a life changing moment occurs it will affect your mental health. It doesn't matter if you know about the life changing moment in advance or if it happens suddenly, you can not prepare for how you react to it. Your baby being born is one of those moments. You can read or hear about how much it changes your life but it doesn’t prepare you for it mentally.
- What are you challenges with a newborn
- Increase your oxytocin to support your health
- Ask for help and work together
As soon as baby is here
When your baby is born your family dynamics change. When it is your first baby you will suddenly go from having a flexible and spontaneous life to a life that is ruled by your baby. You suddenly are responsible for a human life that needs you 24/7. When it is your second child you will need to learn how to share your love between your children. Besides doing that, you are now responsible for two lives who both decide what happens during your day. This is another big life change that you shouldn't underestimate.

Lack of sleep
Not only are your family dynamics changing, but your sleep pattern is changing as well which affects your mental health. In the first few weeks with your newborn you will need to wake up for feeding every three hours. To wake up that often will cause trouble for your deep sleep (REM). The sleep foundation mentioned that when you do not enter your REM you will not process emotional information during your sleep. As you can imagine with everything that is happening in your life you will need your REM sleep. What could really help is to make a schedule with your partner in which you both get a six hour sleep preferably during the night. The organisation COPE has some handy tips on how to help you have a good sleep here.
It is a phase
The good thing about the newborn stage and sleep deprivation is that it is temporary. Your newborn will feed every three hours in the beginning but when they are growing well you can feed them every four hours. This will be an enormous improvement to your sleep. There are also ways to improve your mental health. You can do this by increasing your oxytocin levels. Ways to increase your oxytocin levels can include hugging, going for walks in nature and being taken care of by someone.. Doing something for yourself is also very important. This could be simple things such as having a shower, a massage, having a healthy meal or talking to a friend. These moments are very important for you and your partner and can reduce your stress levels.

Team work
When new parents talk about their newborn they usually do not talk about how hard it is. This makes it seem like it is an easy job and if you find it hard, you might think it’s something you are doing wrong. This is absolutely not the case. Taking care of your baby is a tough job and you should not do it alone because it’s very hard. Even when you don’t have a whole village to support you when you have just one other person to support you it could make a big difference. Communication between parents is also very important. What you are going through is different for you than for your partner, so make sure you are sharing what you are feeling. Understanding what your partner is going through and carrying the load together will not only connect you on a deeper level, it will also feel lighter because you are in it together.
Cradle Care
At Cradle Care we have experience with new parents and the challenges they face with bringing home their newborn. Midwives and Obstetricians are often a first point of contact with expecting parents. When expecting parents are voicing their concerns about their mental health to their midwife or obstetrician they recommend the parents to contact Cradle Care. This is because we have experience in this field. We support parents physically and emotionally through their first weeks with their newborn. If you would like to have some more information about how we can support you and your family, please don’t hesitate to contact us. We are happy to answer any questions.
Links
When you are struggling or you know someone who is, please don't hesitate to reach out. Here are some organisations who specialise in parents with babies and children
PANDA https://panda.org.au
Parent Line
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